And so that feeling of ill remorse
Grew upon memories that stuck to my mind.
The homeless man who taunted when I apologised
That I had no money.
There was no need for the insult he bore.
But still I agree with what was said;
In fact I agree with most of what has been,
Not just by him but others.
The degradation of confidence was the only real victim
Whilst they were victims themselves,
Merely seeing another of their ranks.
Am I all I claim to be?
Am I what people see?
I can never promise smiles
Because I see them as lies,
And I never believe in love
Because I can never trust.
And so that feeling of true self-disgust
Grew upon all I know I am
And so tears away my memories
That stuck remorse to my mind.
So then what am I now
But a beacon of self-negativity
Seeing people for their shadows
But not for their light.